This weekend, the Cupsters, claims jumpers and truckers all take to the white cliffs of Dover. Or at least the semi-white concrete of Dover.
Dover should be much better than it is. It’s only a mile long and has a decent configuration, yet races there tend toward the dull side thus leaving everyone’s mood on the dark side. Which may explain why the place is paved with concrete. Light to offset the dark.
The main story this weekend is but of course… hang on, there’s the phone… “Hello?”
“GRUUH!”
“Miles! Long time no talk. Whatcha been up to these days?”
“Me get ready smash cars! Smash them good! GRUUH!”
“You know you have a truck race too, don’t you?”
“Trucks wait to tomorrow because of rain. Me no care! Trucks run, can’t hide! Miles smash trucks too! Miles equal opportunity smasher. See? Miles politically correct! GRUUH!”
“Well, you do live in New England, after all. Pretty much mandatory there. So what do you make of the whole Dale Earnhardt Jr. crew change deal?”
“Miles upset! Me want be new crew chief! NASCAR say no. Dumb NASCAR! Miles good for Junior! Him miss pit box no more. Miles reach over, grab car so always stop in pit box. Miles pick up car, tire change go fast! Miles put car down front pit road, front everyone else! Junior Nation happy! Miles happy! But no be new crew chief. Miles sad! GRUUH!”
“Did they give you a reason why you weren’t allowed to be the crew chief?”
“No find helmet and fire suit right size.”
“Gee, sorry about that. But they do require all over the wall crew members to wear those.”
“Miles just put arm over wall! NASCAR still say no! Dumb NASCAR! GRUUH!”
“Won’t get a lot of argument about that. So what are you going to do this weekend? Other than smash cars who don’t take the turns properly, that is.”
“Miles do good! Me work charity!”
“Oh, really? What kind of charity work are you doing?”
“Miles see girl Junior fan. Me tell them Miles sell ticket for raffle. Winner get big prize!”
“What — a date with you?”
“Miles no pit lizard!”
“Certainly glad to hear that! So what is the prize?”
“Winner sit Miles shoulder when me step on Kyle Busch hauler!”
“You’ll be able to retire the national debt with that one.”
“GRUUH!”
Hey! You “stole” my banner image!
(like minds and all)
I was going to post a picture of the actual white cliffs of Dover. Then I thought maybe Heathcliffe. Then I decided the post was weird enough already. GRUUH!